Vomit Sandwiches

!!!WARNING!!! Today’s entry discusses sickness and vomit in great detail.  Please don’t read it if you’re suggestable or easily upset. !!!WARNING!!!

Today I was working on a video thing (probably be up tomorrow) and around 1pm I decided to take a nice lunch break, looking in the fridge I found some freaking delicious looking bacon, so I made some unbelievably good bacon and (free range) egg sandwiches.

Man, they were so good.  So I chowed down, then dug back into editing my thing together, about 3.30pm I went outside to shoot a bit of last minute footage and I didn’t know if it was just the shock of leaving my warm cosy little office for the out of doors coldness, but I started to feel a bit funny.

I came back inside, and noticed I was sweating, which didn’t seem right, then I decided that I really was queasy, I messaged Claire to that effect, then headed for the bathroom.  I had a bad feeling.

I assumed the position, kneeling before the throne.  Still not knowing if I was really that sick – you see, I haven’t thrown up in about 9 years – I decided that this might not be comfortable if I was going to be waiting around for 30 minutes before the feeling passed, and I could get back to work.
  So I decided to pull the liner out of the bathroom bin, and sat on the toilet with the bin on my lap.

Within seconds, I was throwing up.  Seconds later I was passed out.  I came to and realised I was throwing up, so I pulled the bin back towards me (I’d been throwing up on my shirt, pants and the floor – I was feeling awful.  I didn’t know what the do next, covered in vomit and feeling weak.  I tried to figure things out, and realised the best thing to do would be to pass out again.  So I did that.  I came to throwing up a bit more.  And then I felt quite a bit better.  I mean, not good.  But better.  I sat there for a while, covered in stinking red vomit, with bits of bacon and eggs on my pants and arms.  (It was red due to all the tomato sauce, God it was horrible until I realised that.)

After a while, I carefully slipped off my shoes (which were miraculously un-vomitty) then stripped off the rest of my clothes and embraced the soothing heat of the shower, and a pack of antibacterial soap, for ages.

Clothes in the washing machine, and mop and bucket later, and I decided actually I was really far to weak to continue with doing anything, at about that time, Claire got home, so we crashed on the sofa for a while.  Berocca was really a godsend.

We’d made plans for dinner, and I told her to go without me, eventually finding the energy to cook up some rice, and a dash of salt and pepper, and a little fish later, I was feeling much more human.

No I’m going to bed to watch some Grey’s Anatomy, and hoping I really am over it.

(I’m pretty sure the bacon must have gone over the edge during the power cut, or something.  But it was delicious man.  I had no freaking idea.)

2 thoughts on “Vomit Sandwiches

  1. I love good sick stories, especially ones that involve cold sweat, passing out, then later having a shower and recovering on the couch. Thanks for sharing.

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