Robert ‘Stick’ Rakete

What's green and sticky?Hot on the heels of Theresa Heinz-Weta comes the newest addition to my tiny little menagerie: Robert S. Rakete. (No relation, and he tells me that the S stands for Stick.)

He’s a lovely little fellow, I was standing at the back stoop contemplating my impending demise when I noticed a little green stick sitting precariously on my environment changing Remuera tractor, I wasn’t fooled for more than .5 of a second though, pieces of tree don’t generally have 6 legs and a propensity to sway around in still conditions. Or look at you with tiny little beady eyes.

Robert the stick insect, playing dead. Click for bigger.I grabbered him and stuffed him in my gob, as I understood that insects favour a nice warm and moist environment, like my underpants, armpit, or aforementioned mouth. It appeared I was wrong, he started struggling and wrestling with my molars, did a wee on my uvula and tagged my tongue with some appallingly insensitive graffiti (she is not a "ho!"), so I spit him out onto my gentle waiting palm and proceeded to fire off about a thousands frames of digital love.

Unlike Theresa, Robert doesn’t appear to be sick in any way, so I’ll just hold onto him for long enough to give Claire a good old fashioned scarifying then deposit him in a tree of his choosing.

P.S. Does anyone know how to get Texta™ permanent marker off the skin of one’s tongue or tooth enamel?