Superbad (2007)

Morgan Avery2 Comments

Let me start by saying that if dick jokes, constant swearing, and endless boy talk about ‘pounding the vag’ aren’t your idea of funny, you’ll hate the fucking shit out of this movie.

I was completely in my element.

The story of a day in the life of three high school kids, as they go about preparing to make an impression (well, hook up with girls) at the last party of their last year in high school before heading off to college. The boy actors (ages 24, 19, and 17, but still boys in my book) are all completely awesome, I’m sure you’ll recognise Michael Cera from Arrested Development, the fat guy Jonah Hill (40 Year Old Virgin, Click, I Heart Huckabees, and so on) and awesome neeeeeeerrrd Christopher Mintz-Plasse (from nothing, but I’m sure he’ll be a character actor in a bunch of other movies now, he was really good).

I don’t want to drop any spoilers, but… McLovin (AKA Fogell, the nerd) not only gets some with a cute ginge, but he finishes off his night by shooting the shit out of a police car and watching it burn. Seth (the fat kid) gets hit by two cars, gives a girl a black eye, and has a sweaty manlove experience in a basement. And our boy Evan wins the girl (Becca AKA Martha MacIsaac, and I don’t mind telling you I thought she was hawt).

Ok, so I guess I did want to drop spoilers after all.

With lines like: Jules “You scratch our backs, we’ll scratch yours.” Seth “Well Jules, the funny thing about my back is that it’s located on my cock.”
There was just no way I wouldn’t enjoy this movie. Ok, that’s not true. There were ways. But it didn’t do any of them!

(Squirting blood bottle fight!)

The cops are great (one of whom is Superbad co-writer Seth Rogan), the boys are great, it’s all funny, and it all ends well. (Yeah, that’s another spoiler, it’s not like I gave away that the nerd died at the beginning and was a ghost for the whole rest of the movie. Oh wait.)

As long as you pay attention to my caveat – dick jokes, swearing, vag – I urge you to go see this movie, though judging by friends that have seen it, Superbad seems to be a bit polarising.

(However, I would just like to point out that after over 35,000 votes have been cast on IMDB, this sucker still has an 8.3 out of 10, which is bloody good.) (Man, I’m going crazy with parentheses lately, huh?) (Bygones.)

Rabbits and cabbage. Rabbits and cabbage. Rabbits and cabbage. Rabbits and cabbage.

Morgan Avery2 Comments

Mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy, mummy. Where are you, mummy?

I have a gun, I could go and shoot something.

Gyrocopter (Stencil)

Morgan Avery

Gyrocopter (Stencil)

These dashing chaps were flying around in their fabulous machine on the same wall as the creepy square-eyed guy was loitering and scaring small children. Nicely cut, and check out the recursion!

Spook Country by William Gibson (2007)

Morgan Avery

Everyone who read Gibson’s earlier work, and isn’t a blinkered fanboy, knows that he wrote some fun dark future scifi, with little regard for any sort of reality. Which is fine I guess, it’s not an encyclopedia, but I’ve read an interview with Gibson in which he was quite blunt about being wilfully ignorant about technology – saying that reality would restrict his imagination. This was pretty much bullshit, let’s be honest. Gibson made his name, his reputation, and no doubt a small pile of money from that crap – completely obsessed with “virtual reality” when that was well past it’s use-by date. (Which I enjoyed, so don’t think I’m saying it’s awful damn rubbish when I use the shorthand term ‘crap’.)

In 2003 Gibson reinvented himself with the release of his novel Pattern Recognition, which was set in the then distant future of the previous year, 2002. He completely nailed it and wrote a vastly more accessible story which was still entertaining for SF fans (if I can use myself as the yardstick, which perhaps is risky). If I recall correctly, even Claire liked it enough to read it through – though I don’t think she liked it much more than that.

This year, Gibson has continued with the new modus operandi with the release of Spook Country, set in the distant future of 2006. It plays out in the same universe as Pattern Recognition, there is even a limited amount of character overlap – for instance Belgian PR/marketing/media guy and all around cloak & dagger impressario Hubertus Bigend plays rather a large role in both. Gibson has allowed a degree of the old virtual reality stuff to feature – in the form of augmented reality stuff, but I think we can for the most part ignore that.

The thing about virtual reality is this: a lot of people occupy ‘virtual’ 3D spaces on the internet today – and have done for years – but none of them use head mounted displays or goggles or anything of that nature. They do it on their monitor, on their TV, or on their laptop. It’s been possible to get display goggles for a decade at least, but nobody does because not only do they look unbelievably stupid but they really don’t make the experience significantly different from just using a decent monitor.

So, with that in mind, perhaps it’s time to move on from featuring ‘virtual reality’ as part of any of these stories. If you’re not in the remote future, VR sucks. Also, if you make a movie that features VR you’ve got to avoid, like AIDS up the bum, having your characters making hand gestures in mid air. That shit is ridiculous. Don’t do it in the movies, and don’t do it in the books either, OK?

So, Spook Country. The story is a former minor music starlet and now wannabe journalist bumps her way to the truth of a story that Bigend has sent her on. Of course, along the way she has to discover first that Bigend is even involved, and then just who he is, and then what he really wants. She also meets the other players involved, old school politicos, hipster artists and the psychologically damaged technophile that enables them to create their ‘locative art’ (computer generated 3d models that only exist in a specific geographic location, visible only when used with particular apparatus – that’s right, VR goggles), and a Cuban/Chinese kid who practices a made up version of Systema that makes him almost superhuman.

Incidentally, what Gibson calls Systema isn’t what the rest of the world calls Systema. The Gibson Systema is awesomely cool, incorporating free running/parquar, martial arts, and a hyper paranoid Cold-War style tradecraft. While the “real” Systema is complete bullshit, including bull shit martial art favourite: the no touch knock out. When the number one practitioner on YouTube is a fat guy in a jersey… you can guess the rest.

It’s a reasonably gentle, highly accessible, and well crafted story – not much really happens, but it’s fun getting there, wherever there is. I recommend you to get a copy next time you find yourself in a bookshop.

The Hills Have Eyes 2 (2007)

Morgan Avery

Sequel to the 2006 re-make of the 1977 original, itself remade in 1985. I’m sure you probably could have guessed without sitting through 89 interminable minutes of this awful shit that this is awful shit. Apparently I’m not quite so smart. The only characters that didn’t suck died early, so then it got even worse – but even while they were still alive it was still utterly, endlessly, stinkingly appalling.

Tears before gametime.

Morgan Avery

It’s not often (it’s not ever) that an advert for a computer game will bring a tear to the eye, but one of the Halo 3 ads completely nailed me.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQiMfG6MAOM[/youtube]

And here is another Halo 3 advert – the same diorama again, and not even a second of gameplay footage. Just a moment in time, frozen. Then, in silence, a hint of a glimmer of motion – and with the move of a head, you can feel that the tides of fate have changed once again.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3PGpn4c96ZU[/youtube]

These people are geniuses. Not only do I want to play this game, but I want to see this movie.

Not taking anything away from the filmmakers behind these spots, but the reality of modern online play can be just a tad different.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TEWIw-a0GJw[/youtube]

The Invasion (2007)

Morgan Avery3 Comments

Another in a long line of remakes of Invasion of the Body Snatchers.

It only occurred to me as I was watching this iteration, but these are Zombie movies. And the thing about Zombie movies is: they scare me, and I like them.

Let me get this one thing out of the way: I really don’t like Nicole Kidman.

Let me get this other thing out of the way: Some stupid shit happens in this movie. (The CDC guy is a fracking maroon. And you remember how 28 Weeks Later was grim? The Invasion isn’t.)

Now, this is another one of those bastard movies that isn’t necessarily good, but isn’t even remotely as bad as I expected – in fact it was quite entertaining, and… yes… I liked it. In fact I think I don’t even hate Nicole Kidman anymore.

If you’re at a loose end of an evening you could do much worse, but if you’re going to risk it you’d better move quickly as The Invasion will be beating a hasty retreat from theaters in 3… 2…

What on Earth is going on at the World Cup?

Morgan Avery3 Comments

I was watching reruns of the first Rugby World Cup match between the All Blacks and Italy tonight, and something caught my eye that for some reason I didn’t notice when I watched the game live the other day.

I thought my eyes were playing tricks on me, or perhaps it was a prank from someone at TV 3?
Outside Backs

But there he was again while the boys were waiting to run out onto the field…
Ready to go on field

I feel like I’m going crazy.
Going in for a Try!

But if you can score, you can stay…
Just look at that, beautiful.

He’s not even a New Zealander is he?
Darth Howlett

[Edit: Hi Public Address readers, and thanks for the link Russell.]

Lifted (2006)

Morgan Avery

Just 5 minutes long, this Pixar produced CG animation is the story of a young alien’s ‘license to abduct’ test… Of course the catch is that the operation console isn’t very userfriendly. Pity the teenage kid in the beam.

Released in conjunction with Ratatouille, but I’m sure you can find it on YouTube or *cough*, and you should try – this is quite possibly the best short Pixar has ever produced. Good enough, in fact, that I can even forgive them the Wilhelm dropped in at the end.

Lifted (2006, Pixar)

Spoilers: I’m pretty sure he fails the test.