Ladies, don’t be afraid. That feeling in your cockles? That’s the pure animal magnetism being generated by my stache. Clinical studies are so far inconclusive on the long term effects of exposure to the stache, but early results indicate only a very slightly elevated risk of monsterism.
My cockles are on the verge of sending your ‘stashe a cease and desist letter. This sort of disruptive carry-on has got to stop or no one will get any work done.
Also, please note the luscious little kiss gap, this is a stache built for speed.
NB. I’ve warned my mother to be careful next time she visits, she will very carefully access my site with eyes closed for the time being.
Son? That’s no son of mine. My son has cute golden curls and blue eyes, I remember him well. If fictitiously.