I really didn’t mean to startle you. I knew after your ridiculous launch from the previous lights that you were trying to goad me into racing with you, and I really don’t know why you were doing it, I was just minding my own business, looking for some dinner. So you must have been very surprised, in your turbo VW Passat, when my little Roadster blew you the fuck away. I guess instead of spending money on that blow-off valve, you should have learned how to drive? Maybe next time.

(But it won’t be with me, I don’t know what I was thinking. I never should have taken the bait.)